Holy dramatic - its unfortunate sure, but a little over the top if you ask me.
I'm sure its frustrating but they probably have a call center type place, its not as consumer friendly as say cork-sport where you can actually talk to someone direct. Its unfortunate, but your best bet would be go to an autoshop that deals with AEM directly and tell them what happened and see if they can call AEM for a replacement part on your behalf- you might get a better response from a dealer perspective. I have the luxury of dealing at a wholesale level with Autoparts, any issues I have can get sent back with an RA number, usually no questions asked.
Worth a shot